I Wanted

I wanted to touch her face
To put my arms around her
And pull her bosom to my own
I wanted to explore every part of her
With fingertips and lips
Breathing in all that is exquisite
And relish in a beauty that is her

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Love and thoughts

Love is such a confusing term. When you say you love someone, you are often required to specify the kind of love. Like the love between a mother and child, love between a married couple, love for a sibling, and love for a friend among others. I wouldn’t say that I love everyone, because there are certainly people out there that I don’t particularly care for. Yet, when I say I love people, I don’t mean it differently. The relationship between me and the other party may be a certain way, but love does not necessarily signify the type of relationship. So why the need to specify at all? Why must people restrict and place about all of these rules regarding love and what it is. I often wonder if we truly know or understand the meaning of it at all. The words in our languages only pertain to a miniscule amount of the meaning of love to me. It is this vast and expansive thing. So I get asked if I am a monogamous person in the sense that I only will ever love one person (forget about the sex aspect of this for a moment). No, I am not monogamous in that sense. In the sexual sense, I am comfortable, but I do have desires that are beyond the means of my partner and maybe beyond their comfort level. It’s frustrating sometimes to live trying to fit into societal expectations. People often hear my ramblings as something “cute and funny” or “trying to get attention”. Yet it’s not even about that. It’s just about feeling safe enough and secure enough to express my being and who I am. Certainly, I do not want to tell the world how I feel. I’m not sure I am even explaining it very well in this post.

All I know at this moment is that love is something beyond humanity and still far beyond my understanding of it. Love does not equate attraction. Love does not equate sex.

Me + (Another Person) = Love(without need for understanding or specification)

Break Apart

When I see you I’m mixed with pain and pleasure
Cause I know what’s coming and it doesn’t get better
These cracks are fragile and they make me tremor
Because no amount of glue could hold me together

Before you open your mouth to speak
I break apart and fall at your feet
I don’t mean to be timid and meek
But only you can make me feel so weak